Thursday, October 14, 2010

It's been six and a half months.

wow, what to say. Somedays I feel great. Others I just want to scream at everyone who walks past me and sees me with no baby, and has no idea what happened, that "I just had a baby dang-it" It seems like just yesterday sometimes. It still really hurts, and I miss him. Other people's babies are growing up all around me. Mine is too, he's growing spiritually, we just can't see his growth right now, can't mark it on the wall, or ooooh and ahhh over all his progress. I know that someday I'll be able to raise him and touch him and hold him. This does bring great comfort. But it doesn't take away the pain of not having him now. I'll be patient. I have to. But it doesn't just go away. I'm greatful for the memories I do have, and the moments I feel close to him. I'm greatful for all the blessings my Father in Heaven has given me. I know He cares.